Polygamy... Let's be straight

Polygamy... Let's be straight

It's a man's right to have up to four wives IF he can do justice between them. We know that from An-Nisa 4:3 where it says...

"…marry (other) women of your choice, two or, three, or four; but if you feel that you will not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one..."

And we also know as muslims that Qadar is one of our articles of faith and part of what makes us muslim - Believing that whatever happens (good or bad) is from Allah s.w.t (including who our spouses will be)

"He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect."
Ar-Rum 30:21

"Nothing shall ever happen to us except what Allah has ordained for us."
At-Tauba 9:51

So... really, all muslims (Brothers and Sisters) need to understand that it's not right for an existing wife to say that they "lost" time with their husband because it was never their time to begin with!

1/4 of it was their time... but the rest is the time belonging to their co-wives that they simply got to enjoy (as a bonus) until the co-wife comes into the picture.
A subsequent wife hasn't taken the existing wife's time (even though she will surely lose time)... she has only taken her share of time and then both wives go on enjoying the benefits of their future co-wives time that their husband is yet to take (if he does) Allah'u âlim.

A husband doesn't belong to any of his wives... he belongs first to Allah s.w.t

"...Indeed we belong to Allah , and indeed to Him we will return."
Al-Baqara 2:156

...and then the hoor-al-ain (his wives in Jennah) that are waiting for him...

"The Prophet s.a.w said: "A woman does not hurt her husband in this world without his wives among the hoor-al-ain saying, 'Do not injure him, may Allah fight you! He is a guest with you who is about to leave you for us." (Tirmidhi)

So this 'self entitlement' that some existing wives have, and also the pity that some people feel for existing wives needs to stop. Existing wives do not need to be congratulated for "allowing" their husband to marry again or "accepting" their husband’s marriage Na'uthubillah... we as muslims HAVE to accept polygamy because it's part of Allah's decree and who are we to have an opinion on what Allah s.w.t has decreed or made halal or haram...

"It is not for a believer, man or woman, when Allah and His Messenger have decreed a matter that they should have any option in their decision. And whoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed into a plain error". Qur’an Al-Ahzab 33:36

"And say not concerning that which your tongues put forth falsely: “This is lawful and this is forbidden,” so as to invent lies against Allah. Verily, those who invent lies against Allah will never prosper". Qur’an An-Nahl 16:116

It amazes me that some women think that they are doing their co-wife a favour by "accepting" her... that the subsequent wife should be "greatful" and "forever in her debt"

So I'll leave you with this...

You're not actually doing any good, until you love for your sister what you love for yourself.