Monday, May 30, 2016

I finally found my identity: I am Amy, I am American, and I am Muslim. Alhamdulillah.





My name is Amy and I am a Muslim revert. I converted almost 2 years ago. Before I became Muslim, I was a practicing Christian. My story from Christianity to Islam all started when I enrolled in Arabic courses at my university and I started to learn how connected the language is to religion. Naturally, I became curious... I started to see how Islam was not how I thought; it was not how the media portrayed it; it was not how my fellow Christian's described it. It was about 4 years ago that I began my research on Islam. I read books, studied the Quran in Arabic, took classes, and met with a local Imam and Muslim friends. When I discovered that perhaps everything I had been raised to believe might be wrong, I was devastated, hurt, and conflicted with what to do. I stayed without an identity for over a year... In sort of a religious limbo... Not sure of what to believe, what to declare as the truth. I cried often, prayed daily, and begged God for answers and clarity. Finally, He responded. One day after studying and feeling especially emotionally tormented and confused by my own thoughts, I decided to try to pray Salah.. the ritual prayer. I spent the day practicing and trying to perfect the pronunciation of each word. After I finished my first full prayer without error, I began to weep. With tears flowing, I went to wash my face in order to calm myself down. When I looked at myself in the mirror, wrapped in hijab, I realized, there is no turning back. I told myself "Amy, your outside is matching your inside now. You are Muslim. Do not deny what you know is the truth." As I washed my face, And began to calm down, I felt a sudden wave of peace... The year long of struggle was over. I finally found my identity: I am Amy, I am American, and I am Muslim. Alhamdullah.

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